Harriet is asleep upstairs on our bed! It's the best time to blog about something or spend some time playing some games I've always wanted to. I mean, otherwise Harriet would just LOVE to sit on my keyboard and I can't do anything else other than to shut down, bring her away and let her fall asleep on my lap. She wouldn't sit on my lap quietly if I were to be sitting here in front of my laptop. There's just something about the keyboard, both on the laptop and desktop that she just likes to sit on and stare back at us. Then she would proceed to sleep on it.. Oh Harriet, what would I do without you. :)

Anyhoo, I have always feel like people don't understand me. To be honest, I don't know why that bothers me either.

??

The thing that triggered me today was the "statement" about me being a volunteer.
I love the fact that I get to spend some of my time doing something, but is it really for a good cause? At least that's what people would think I am doing so. I just do it because it makes me feel good.. also for me to gain some experience; people skills and potentially some 'working' skills, so that I could get a paid job after. It really is a good start to things.. I don't do it for the sole reason of me wanting to give back and be credited for that. I don't do it to tell people to see how good I am of a person, 'giving back' to whatever cause I am involved in. I just do it because it makes me feel good. It sounds rather selfish, but I am definitely getting something out of these experiences.

Back when I was an "intern" at Zoo Negara, I despised people who volunteered at the zoo. Because to be frank, I don't know what they are learning from these ONE DAY experience. Don't forget, volunteers are free manpower. Who wouldn't appreciate free man power for the day? I do feel like I would lose out for wasting one day of doing something and not learning anything from it. Anyways, back to those volunteers at Zoo Negara, they gave me that vibe where they are just doing it just so they are happy with the thought of "doing something good for the community". Then, the keepers weren't going to risk much and of course only gave the volunteers sweeping and cleaning tasks. Of course, volunteers would complain. This is when you know they aren't really sincere about volunteering in the first place. Sigh. 'Volunteering with friends' is even worse.

WELL. That wasn't very nice of me.

Because getting a spot as a volunteer for both RSPCA and Melbourne Zoo was a considerably lengthy process to go through.
1. Constant search and refresh on their websites about volunteer position openings.
2. Apply with a resume (includes questions to get to know you a little better).
3. Attend an interview.
4. Go through training.
5. Sit for an assessment/ test.
6. CONGRATULATIONS.
It takes about a month from the time you apply til the day you actually start as a volunteer.
There is also a probation period of 3 months with a commitment of at least one shift per fortnight.

YAY!
It's almost like a job.. with no pay.

Initially when I started, I wondered why am I doing so much eventhough I am only a volunteer. I don't really do simple stuff, I am actually helping to do stuff so that the 'company' runs smoother. I actually get pretty knackered by the end of each shift I do. I get absolutely happy when I get to be relieved early, but I wouldn't mind staying for the entire duration either. Like I said, it really does feel like I am working, for no pay. I was also hating on the fact that some people are doing less work than me but are getting paid to do them. BUT HEY, people need to start somewhere.. right? I sure hope so.

But I am really grateful that there are such positions available where it gives me a chance to learn some life/work skills before I get paid for my first job. Otherwise, I am probably never going to get hired.. at least I am hoping I am doing the right things this time. Aussies are serious about experiences, no matter how big or small, they would rather hire someone who has heaps more experience than somebody who has nothing. It's not about the brains here, it's all about EXPERIENCE.

I've always wanted to volunteer at RSPCA, but I never really gotten the chance to. This was back in uni when I lived in Clayton and was busy playing frisbee and "studying". But after I've graduated, I thought it would be a good start for me. It was the very first thing that I got a successful response from after a series of sorrys. From there, I knew I had to take a certificate 2 in Animal Care, a diploma sort of degree that focuses on the technical part rather than books and brains. During my 22nd birthday, Jinwei brought me to the zoo and I told myself I want to work there someday. I kept true to what I said, and applied for a volunteer position (after being rejected for a paid role). Which I was very proud of getting! But now I know that I probably don't want to work in a zoo for the rest of my life..

For my 23rd birthday, I will be spending my day at the zoo as a volunteer. :)

I am beaming on the inside. It is like a dream come true.

But of course, dreams have now been made to reality. Now I need to get a paid job somewhere..

Men and games.

I thought I would be fine with my boyfriend spending his time playing video games all day. I never thought I would be pissed and annoyed at the fact that he is spending most of his time playing video games all day.

Well, life has me getting very annoyed at him not actually spending his time searching and applying for jobs and instead sitting at his desktop playing LoL or Rocket League all day.. It particularly annoys me when he doesn't get things done. #LYFE

I mean, that's what his brother does all day and all night too. SIGH

Who am I to say anything. It's not like I am spending my time searching for jobs either..

I was supposed to start a new blog, just so I get to have an entire 'book' of happiness rather than mashing everything into one blog. But I never really gotten to do that. Even now, I am back to typing stuff in this old blog of mine. I guess in a way it does feel like I am growing up with this blog. The transition moments from when I had my first step into adulthood in 2011 as a 18 year old to 2016 as a 23 year old. Good moments and bad, I think I can embrace them all now. :)

Speaking of which, I probably had my first laptop when I started using this blog url. Now, I have a new laptop! Hooray me! Part of me feels cheeky, but other part of me felt rather accomplished. My new laptop is actually the same laptop, except that it's now silver and an upgrade of intel core i7. Minus the beats audio feature, but I guess that's not too bad. It's just as heavy and this time it's SILVER instead of my previous black. It does feel like I am using an apple product because of the silver coating. But I am happy that it's similar to my old laptop, in a way there's less adjustments to make and it's more of an upgrade to my older laptop which died of a broken fan due to overheating. 

WHAT HAS HAPPENED since I last posted..?

we've adopted Harriet! <3

my gorgeous little red burmese bub. 

I am now a volunteer at Melbourne Zoo

I am also a volunteer in the cattery of RSPCA burwood

and I'm still not done with my cert II ;D

I spent an entire year not looking for a job. It's a negative, but I'm not entirely depressed about it. In a way I kinda learned different set of knowledge and thought from that. Right now I guess, I really need to look for a job that pays. Hopefully now I am better qualified for a job that actually pays for my efforts. 

I haven't been complaining much about life. Except I still complain about everything to Jinwei. HAHA. unfortunate Jinwei. :x

Life without Facebook is pretty good too! :D

Though of course that meant I had more time on Instagram. But at least it's much easier to control as I could easily unfollow people on Instagram than on Facebook. This is simply because I am following less friends on Instagram than Facebook. In a way, it also made me much more difficult to reach. With that, it also closed a whole lot of doors for me. People had to go through Jinwei in order to reach me. Which I find rather relieving because when these matters do reach me, I would know that they are actual important issues. Being off Facebook also allowed me to explore life more.. it allowed me to feel and understand myself more which then allowed me to respond to other things surrounding me more organically.. if that even made sense. Maybe it's allowed me to feel slightly more confident with myself and the things I do, rather than constantly trying to showcase myself to others and wait for their response to prove that I am doing the right thing. This should be an entire post by itself. But that is fine.

I do feel very rusty typing stuff out now though. It has been almost an entire year since I last sat down and actually type about things. There had been so many good moments last year that I never bothered documenting. It does feel like I've lost a whole lot of momentos, now that I could never look back at it and go 'oh, that's what happened to me then'.

There had been so many new discoveries for me last year. Living with a partner has many ups and downs that I never manage to talk about. I wasn't sure if it was a good thing to talk about as I was afraid that it would come back and haunt me someday. But in all seriousness, I really need to remember how talking to myself (blogging) actually helps me clear up a thought or two and it is actually rather therapeutical. I can honestly say that I have been too dependent on Jinwei to keep my mind and thoughts in line. OH what should I do to remind myself no to?

Maybe now I've gotten past the phase of 'omg, we're living together' that I could sit down and find more time to be with myself. Right now I need to figure out what is best for myself, be more rational and feel less impulsive. That would take a while.. but I think I'll get there.

Nobody reads this, but this is like a little letter to my future self. 

'THIS IS WHO YOU WERE'

was your nintendo ds really a good idea?