I am literally travelling the world! Have I been mentioning this? I am pretty sure I have. I am part complaining about it, and part boasting about it, but mainly, it is just a topic to talk about. :/
I still have my freedom of speech, and I shall abuse it.
Week 1 : Malaysia
Week 2 : Macau + Hong Kong
Week 3 : Korea
Weel 4 : Singapore
Literally, it feels like I am travelling all over South East Asia. What a way to spend my winter break, escaping the freezing cold temperatures of Melbourne, away to the hotter parts of Asia with temperatures ranging from 27 - 33 degrees Celsius.
This kind of trip, would be one matter where people would envy. Or so to say, people around me have been mentioning on how lucky I am for being able to do this. Somewhat of a dream holiday for them.
Maybe I am being a princess, maybe I am being an irritant. But I honestly have no excitement with this current layout of plans. Yes, it is a dream to have a visit in South Korea, yes, I have the chance to do a tremendous amount of travelling than anyone could even possibly thought of. It feels like I am being spoilt to the max. Not quite liking how this is making me look like to my friends. But it is something that has been bothering me, and I felt like talking about it. Responses have been rather... cold.
What I wanted most was just to hang around in Malaysia for as long as I can. Malaysia is my home. The place where I grew up, the place where I am most fond of, the place where I feel more loved.
"Spend so long time in Malaysia for what?"
Considering it is Mummy who says that, I could not answer that question. I knew very well what my answer would be, but I simply could not say it. Because I know it is not the right answer to be said, but I know that is what my heart wants.
'Malaysia is my home.'
Though I have been driving around without a driver's license, and wondering around without my identity card, also not having much malaysian currency on me whenever I hang out. Feeling much of a foreigner, but I knew deep down, this is where I belong.
Initial plans of spending ten days with Mummy made me feel extremely selfish. EXTREMELY SELFISH. What was worst that I could not have the heart to tell her the reason why I wanted to stay in Malaysia for a longer period of time. It is inhumane. :(
Then plans changed, now I will be spending 2 weeks with darling Mummy, hanging around Macau and HongKong, then a trip to South Korea. Also not forgetting Mummy's treat to watch Girls Generation live on the 2nd of July!
Everything else fell into place just about right. Spending time with my aunt on a little trip to Singapore once I get back from my Macau trip.
Everything else is fine, set, and flawless.
But ten days home is heartbreaking-ly short.
6.58pm
29th June 2012.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Bubbletea count: 5?
Pretty sure it's more than that. I could have bubbletea everyday, if I could. Those chewy thingys could keep me occupied for at least an hour. Great time waster, if you ask me. Hehehe
I find it an amusement to have something to chew in my mouth. It is a bad habit of mine. One that looks really funny and rude to the public, one where my sis, aunt and mom would scold me for. One main reason why it takes me forever to eat my meal. Hehehe
Le amusement of having something to chew! :P
One had habit revealed. Oops.
Still loving bubbletea!
With the perfect combination of good flavoured drink and a good chewable substance, it is perfect for me!
Bubbletea is unhealthy.
How is thay so? Isnt it just tea with chewable food in it? :O
Pearl with unhealthy concoction of substances.
I opted for fruit jelly instead. Healthier or no? :O
Bubbletea freak!
5.52pm
29th June 2012.
Pretty sure it's more than that. I could have bubbletea everyday, if I could. Those chewy thingys could keep me occupied for at least an hour. Great time waster, if you ask me. Hehehe
I find it an amusement to have something to chew in my mouth. It is a bad habit of mine. One that looks really funny and rude to the public, one where my sis, aunt and mom would scold me for. One main reason why it takes me forever to eat my meal. Hehehe
Le amusement of having something to chew! :P
One had habit revealed. Oops.
Still loving bubbletea!
With the perfect combination of good flavoured drink and a good chewable substance, it is perfect for me!
Bubbletea is unhealthy.
How is thay so? Isnt it just tea with chewable food in it? :O
Pearl with unhealthy concoction of substances.
I opted for fruit jelly instead. Healthier or no? :O
Bubbletea freak!
5.52pm
29th June 2012.
How is it possible that a person can drive so terribly?
Plus the policemen doing random roadblocks at random places.
Driving without license can be really risky here.
Without fail, you will encounter someone who drives like crap. Not sure if it's on purpose or because it is innate. Either way, if two or more drivers at that same time are crappy drivers, then the chances of escaping an accident is very unlikely.
Blaming the car for malfunctioning would only reflect back onto the driver; for being careless, for being ignorant. I mean, how is it possible for something that is not alive, not have a brain, be the blame of casualties? Why not blame God altogether for the reason why humans are careless.
Then again... We would come up with a quote that goes; we learn from mistakes. What if it's too late to learn from a mistake?
5.20pm
28th June 2012.
Plus the policemen doing random roadblocks at random places.
Driving without license can be really risky here.
Without fail, you will encounter someone who drives like crap. Not sure if it's on purpose or because it is innate. Either way, if two or more drivers at that same time are crappy drivers, then the chances of escaping an accident is very unlikely.
Blaming the car for malfunctioning would only reflect back onto the driver; for being careless, for being ignorant. I mean, how is it possible for something that is not alive, not have a brain, be the blame of casualties? Why not blame God altogether for the reason why humans are careless.
Then again... We would come up with a quote that goes; we learn from mistakes. What if it's too late to learn from a mistake?
5.20pm
28th June 2012.
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Being too demanding once in awhile is alright.
But be prepared that you might not get anything at all from all those demands you make.
A tiny part of me feels regretful for coming home. The time frame is just too short and it didn't feel like it is worth all the worryings. So many more people who I am dying to meet up with, but I couldn't. So many more good food to eat, but I can't. So many more places to go to, but no time. It breaks my heart knowing so. One week, is simply not enough. :/
Two weeks in Macau. Mummy kept asking me, "why do you need to spend such a long time in Malaysia?". From an initial ten days with her, it has now become a two weeks duration; one week Macau, one week elsewhere. Mummy wanted to bring me on a trip. But it was a so called difficult decision for I was worried about the language barrier and I was still 'touchy' about the fact that she went Korea without me before. I was hoping she would go with the group tour, then I would not have to worry so much with the language and where to go and all. Yes, it is much cheaper, but this is not something I want to be doing on my holiday; worrying.
4 days in Seoul, is the current plan. Mummy told me to have plans on what to do and where to visit before we go.
I told mummy that I would only go to Seoul with my friends, for we would spend our days trying to find artists or going into any broadcastings, just to scream out loud. At least then, if I could not understand what is being said to me, my friend would have helped with the communication.
Being princess-y as of now, you can say. But you can't blame me for thinking thoroughly.
12.19pm
27th June 2012.
But be prepared that you might not get anything at all from all those demands you make.
A tiny part of me feels regretful for coming home. The time frame is just too short and it didn't feel like it is worth all the worryings. So many more people who I am dying to meet up with, but I couldn't. So many more good food to eat, but I can't. So many more places to go to, but no time. It breaks my heart knowing so. One week, is simply not enough. :/
Two weeks in Macau. Mummy kept asking me, "why do you need to spend such a long time in Malaysia?". From an initial ten days with her, it has now become a two weeks duration; one week Macau, one week elsewhere. Mummy wanted to bring me on a trip. But it was a so called difficult decision for I was worried about the language barrier and I was still 'touchy' about the fact that she went Korea without me before. I was hoping she would go with the group tour, then I would not have to worry so much with the language and where to go and all. Yes, it is much cheaper, but this is not something I want to be doing on my holiday; worrying.
4 days in Seoul, is the current plan. Mummy told me to have plans on what to do and where to visit before we go.
I told mummy that I would only go to Seoul with my friends, for we would spend our days trying to find artists or going into any broadcastings, just to scream out loud. At least then, if I could not understand what is being said to me, my friend would have helped with the communication.
Being princess-y as of now, you can say. But you can't blame me for thinking thoroughly.
12.19pm
27th June 2012.
Monday, June 25, 2012
The moment of realisation when you are too far behind to catch up.
Would you give up or would you push your darndest to get it on par or even better?
That passion for cheer had never once died out. I would just be extremely excited whenever there is a cheer element around. I just couldn't. Each time I try to find a way back into the sport, things never turned out well, and as years passed, it feels as though I could no longer keep up.
Watching REBELS perform was pretty much a dream come true. Ever since I knew about them, I tried following up with whatever they do. Somehow, they were the reason why I felt like I still have the chance to cheer again someday. Adding some of the members on Facebook, just to keep up with their cheer lives, they all inspire me. The jealousy of seeing them all in cheer outfits, pulling out awesome stunts and such. Ahh...
I had the chance to join one of their practice. One can never know how much that one practice meant to me. Nervous as hell, knowing that I knew some of these people just plainly through Facebook, also my nonexistent capability to cheer... It gets a little too overwhelming. But no doubt, it was one of the best experience I ever had. Making me wish I could cheer again as something that is more than a hobby.
Cheerleadering is life.
I am sure many out there could relate to this. I wish I could too.
Wishing.
Maybe I should stop? 6years of trying, but I have yet to get it back into my life. With so much advanceness in cheer today, I don't know how am I capable of catching up. Maybe as a backspotter? Lol. I just gave myself a little hope there. I couldn't do a cartwheel properly, what chances do I get for landing a spot in a proper cheerleading squad, right? :/
Also, this scoliosis is another factor.
Letting go, has never been easy. It never will be, ever.
Would you give up or would you push your darndest to get it on par or even better?
That passion for cheer had never once died out. I would just be extremely excited whenever there is a cheer element around. I just couldn't. Each time I try to find a way back into the sport, things never turned out well, and as years passed, it feels as though I could no longer keep up.
Watching REBELS perform was pretty much a dream come true. Ever since I knew about them, I tried following up with whatever they do. Somehow, they were the reason why I felt like I still have the chance to cheer again someday. Adding some of the members on Facebook, just to keep up with their cheer lives, they all inspire me. The jealousy of seeing them all in cheer outfits, pulling out awesome stunts and such. Ahh...
I had the chance to join one of their practice. One can never know how much that one practice meant to me. Nervous as hell, knowing that I knew some of these people just plainly through Facebook, also my nonexistent capability to cheer... It gets a little too overwhelming. But no doubt, it was one of the best experience I ever had. Making me wish I could cheer again as something that is more than a hobby.
Cheerleadering is life.
I am sure many out there could relate to this. I wish I could too.
Wishing.
Maybe I should stop? 6years of trying, but I have yet to get it back into my life. With so much advanceness in cheer today, I don't know how am I capable of catching up. Maybe as a backspotter? Lol. I just gave myself a little hope there. I couldn't do a cartwheel properly, what chances do I get for landing a spot in a proper cheerleading squad, right? :/
Also, this scoliosis is another factor.
Letting go, has never been easy. It never will be, ever.
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Have I become overly dependent on them? Have I become too dependent to a point where I have impaired myself?
Lovely meatball event. One where I would time and time again organise to get people together. It makes me feel like I belong somewhere, surrounded with people I know, people whom I can feel comfortable amongst. It feels good. The joy, the company, that old feeling whereby despite how much has changed, we could still gather and feel like nothing has changed. It was nice. :)
9.50pm
23rd June 2012.
Lovely meatball event. One where I would time and time again organise to get people together. It makes me feel like I belong somewhere, surrounded with people I know, people whom I can feel comfortable amongst. It feels good. The joy, the company, that old feeling whereby despite how much has changed, we could still gather and feel like nothing has changed. It was nice. :)
9.50pm
23rd June 2012.
Nothing's changed. Not one bit has changed. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
The good thing about it, is that I am giving myself a break from all those drastic changes I had been through after 5 months of being on my own. The scale of the loneliness is absolutely no match to what I have been whining about for the past 18 years of my life. Constant learning about the changes that takes place gradually, eventually. Even if you deny that you have changed, time will always change things. Sometimes, the effects are taking place too slow, you don't even realise the change. But as of now, it seems like it is very difficult to identify the change as a whole. Unless, you take the time out, and just focus on one individual.
I know I have changed.
All I am thinking about is how I lived my life in Australia for the past 5 months, and comparing with the life here in Malaysia that I used to have. Drastic changes in me, if you ask me.
One example would be my shopping habit.
Obviously shopping here in Malaysia is so much more cheaper than shopping in Australia. I have learned to only purchase things that are on sale, even so, I would still question myself if I need it or it will only be there for display. I battled with my noggins and convinced myself that I will make full use of it before buying. Especially with the currency difference, I had to comfort myself and spend based on the aussie currency and not multiplying or dividing with the currency difference. This in turn has brought me into a total confusion when I shop here. Despite comforting myself, I would still be reminded of the currency difference and shop necessarily. Here, I look at a rm15 item, and think that it is 15aud. 15aud is the cheapest thing to buy and own, considering it is a piece of clothing. I stand there looking at that pretty piece of clothe, staring back at me blankly. Help?
I am watching an event fail in front of me. Not my nature at all, really. Considering I do not have a driver's license with me, I myself have problems with getting to the place too. Best part? I hosted the event. It is unlike me at all, not putting in effort in making sure everyone will be there for the event. It was as though I have no strength left to put any effort into it. Hence, I am watching it disintegrating before me.
This is giving me a chance to track back to where I came from, to where I am presently.
I was stressed about coming home. That fear where everything will be different.
Honestly? There are differences. But I am not putting attention to the difference, and digesting the overall view of things.
2.50am
23rd June 2012.
The good thing about it, is that I am giving myself a break from all those drastic changes I had been through after 5 months of being on my own. The scale of the loneliness is absolutely no match to what I have been whining about for the past 18 years of my life. Constant learning about the changes that takes place gradually, eventually. Even if you deny that you have changed, time will always change things. Sometimes, the effects are taking place too slow, you don't even realise the change. But as of now, it seems like it is very difficult to identify the change as a whole. Unless, you take the time out, and just focus on one individual.
I know I have changed.
All I am thinking about is how I lived my life in Australia for the past 5 months, and comparing with the life here in Malaysia that I used to have. Drastic changes in me, if you ask me.
One example would be my shopping habit.
Obviously shopping here in Malaysia is so much more cheaper than shopping in Australia. I have learned to only purchase things that are on sale, even so, I would still question myself if I need it or it will only be there for display. I battled with my noggins and convinced myself that I will make full use of it before buying. Especially with the currency difference, I had to comfort myself and spend based on the aussie currency and not multiplying or dividing with the currency difference. This in turn has brought me into a total confusion when I shop here. Despite comforting myself, I would still be reminded of the currency difference and shop necessarily. Here, I look at a rm15 item, and think that it is 15aud. 15aud is the cheapest thing to buy and own, considering it is a piece of clothing. I stand there looking at that pretty piece of clothe, staring back at me blankly. Help?
I am watching an event fail in front of me. Not my nature at all, really. Considering I do not have a driver's license with me, I myself have problems with getting to the place too. Best part? I hosted the event. It is unlike me at all, not putting in effort in making sure everyone will be there for the event. It was as though I have no strength left to put any effort into it. Hence, I am watching it disintegrating before me.
This is giving me a chance to track back to where I came from, to where I am presently.
I was stressed about coming home. That fear where everything will be different.
Honestly? There are differences. But I am not putting attention to the difference, and digesting the overall view of things.
2.50am
23rd June 2012.
Friday, June 22, 2012
21 jump street
Nine
Alice in Wonderland
Spent the past 5 hours watching movies. Still about 3 hours worth of flight. Glaring into my window, the sky looks as though it is raining stars. Somewhat like a view of fireworks during special days. Feeling slightly nostalgic at the moment. A total number of 4 cups of tea today, nicely jamming up my sleeping pattern. I guess it works well considering it's a midnight flight. Would have been a terrible complaint if I were to try to sleep but not being able to. At least I am given food and entertainment, I'd say the money was well spent.
It had been a rough month *sortoff*. Could blame the examination stress and such. But I never expected I would be stressed out about going home either. Never in a million years. Then it hit me. Prior to the examination season, I was all excited about going home; thinking of all those glorious food I will be able to eat, wearing shorts and doing some much needed shopping. Things changed, my time now seemed pretty much packed, and I will not have time for everybody. I guess it was a matter of bad timing?
Maybe I was being a little too demanding, being slightly princess-y, wanting to have everything going as smoothly it can be without me putting a single effort into. Somewhat saying: I have suffered enough, I need some royalty treatment for abit. Mmmmmh. Yeah. I was expecting too much at that point.
5 months in Melbourne on my own had passed. I learned to live like a total stranger, probably not even existing to most. Had problems communicating too. Can I say that I have lost all my confidence and social skills? Learning to manage problems, household and money issues. Sometimes, it feels like I am being forced to grow up. One thing I know for sure is, that I have finally accepted my life as it is living in Melbourne. Still feeling the loneliness at times, but I had to kick it away somehow. All is well.
I almost forgotten about the time difference between Melbourne and Malaysia, as it seems unnecessary these days. Friends come and go. If they find you, good for you. They don't? Then you know where they truly stand on your friend scale. :)
Even the currency thing, I almost couldnt bother either. Simply because I am ALWAYS purchasing things that are on discount or sale. Also, if I were to calculate, I am pretty sure I would end up not eating. Yet with the scarcity of food from time to time (plus occasional lazy days), I am still gaining weight. Hrmmmmmm
Getting really sleepy noww. Update soon!
Going home to relive myself, can I find it though?
5.08am
21st June 2012.
Lol. Feeling extremely blur. Only 2.5 hours of sleep. 4 and a half cups of tea. Blur to a point someone had to pretty much look after me. Hehehe. Really nice of her though. :X Oops. Too much of being pampered as the 'youngest' around there. :O Wondering if I should change to Malaysian time or not.
8.50am
21st June 2011.
It's still aussie time for this phone. Think I shall just leave it as it is. Heh. Wonder why am I doing a live blog sort of post. I just felt like capturing every moment of it somehow. Still wide awake at the moment. Thank you tea, thank you. :P
It really does feel nice to be home, honestly. It makes me happy somehow. My aunt picked me up and I started telling her stories that I couldn't. Haha! Though I do feel tired, but I was happy. Things were still the same. Grocery shopping seemed a little bizarre to me since my shopping habit has grown into a level of its own. The greens here made me confused, but I managed to pick up a few of those I remembered were my favs. Aunt's cooking for dinner! YEAY! :D
The weather... What is with the haze?! :( Will take some time to readjust myself into this temp for sure. Hahahahaha! Yes. Indeed.
I don't think I will be sleeping anytime soon though. :P
10.45am
21st June 2012.
Know what's scary? It's that this might all be a dream. Fact: temporary relief.
12.06pm
21st June 2012.
Nine
Alice in Wonderland
Spent the past 5 hours watching movies. Still about 3 hours worth of flight. Glaring into my window, the sky looks as though it is raining stars. Somewhat like a view of fireworks during special days. Feeling slightly nostalgic at the moment. A total number of 4 cups of tea today, nicely jamming up my sleeping pattern. I guess it works well considering it's a midnight flight. Would have been a terrible complaint if I were to try to sleep but not being able to. At least I am given food and entertainment, I'd say the money was well spent.
It had been a rough month *sortoff*. Could blame the examination stress and such. But I never expected I would be stressed out about going home either. Never in a million years. Then it hit me. Prior to the examination season, I was all excited about going home; thinking of all those glorious food I will be able to eat, wearing shorts and doing some much needed shopping. Things changed, my time now seemed pretty much packed, and I will not have time for everybody. I guess it was a matter of bad timing?
Maybe I was being a little too demanding, being slightly princess-y, wanting to have everything going as smoothly it can be without me putting a single effort into. Somewhat saying: I have suffered enough, I need some royalty treatment for abit. Mmmmmh. Yeah. I was expecting too much at that point.
5 months in Melbourne on my own had passed. I learned to live like a total stranger, probably not even existing to most. Had problems communicating too. Can I say that I have lost all my confidence and social skills? Learning to manage problems, household and money issues. Sometimes, it feels like I am being forced to grow up. One thing I know for sure is, that I have finally accepted my life as it is living in Melbourne. Still feeling the loneliness at times, but I had to kick it away somehow. All is well.
I almost forgotten about the time difference between Melbourne and Malaysia, as it seems unnecessary these days. Friends come and go. If they find you, good for you. They don't? Then you know where they truly stand on your friend scale. :)
Even the currency thing, I almost couldnt bother either. Simply because I am ALWAYS purchasing things that are on discount or sale. Also, if I were to calculate, I am pretty sure I would end up not eating. Yet with the scarcity of food from time to time (plus occasional lazy days), I am still gaining weight. Hrmmmmmm
Getting really sleepy noww. Update soon!
Going home to relive myself, can I find it though?
5.08am
21st June 2012.
Lol. Feeling extremely blur. Only 2.5 hours of sleep. 4 and a half cups of tea. Blur to a point someone had to pretty much look after me. Hehehe. Really nice of her though. :X Oops. Too much of being pampered as the 'youngest' around there. :O Wondering if I should change to Malaysian time or not.
8.50am
21st June 2011.
It's still aussie time for this phone. Think I shall just leave it as it is. Heh. Wonder why am I doing a live blog sort of post. I just felt like capturing every moment of it somehow. Still wide awake at the moment. Thank you tea, thank you. :P
It really does feel nice to be home, honestly. It makes me happy somehow. My aunt picked me up and I started telling her stories that I couldn't. Haha! Though I do feel tired, but I was happy. Things were still the same. Grocery shopping seemed a little bizarre to me since my shopping habit has grown into a level of its own. The greens here made me confused, but I managed to pick up a few of those I remembered were my favs. Aunt's cooking for dinner! YEAY! :D
The weather... What is with the haze?! :( Will take some time to readjust myself into this temp for sure. Hahahahaha! Yes. Indeed.
I don't think I will be sleeping anytime soon though. :P
10.45am
21st June 2012.
Know what's scary? It's that this might all be a dream. Fact: temporary relief.
12.06pm
21st June 2012.
Monday, June 18, 2012
With the Girls' Generation. BoomBoomBoom!
I have an hour until my stats paper starts. Honestly, I feel traumatized by my previous maths paper (last year). That paper really scarred me bad. :(
Maths is one subject I dread most out all my subjects. Ever since the alphabets came in, additional maths was something I could never do. And hence, the panic. For wanting to do good, but incapable of doing so. :/ I just couldn't grasp the concept. A Chinese Asian who know nuts about maths, is quite an embarrassment.
Anyhow. I remember very well I was worried sick for my math paper last year. Stayed up til late to do some studying. Ended up indulging into a pint of green tea icecream. Which was a very bad idea; it kept up wide awake, wide awake til I had to force myself to sleep at 7am in the morning. Thankfully, the paper wasnt til noon. Which meant, I still have time to have some rest and head over for the exam. I was wrong still. :/ I ended up feeling so much more panic-ier than I should ever. When I was waiting for the doors to open, I knew I forgotten to bring something along with me. Little did I know, it was the most important thing for the examination: the two precede of paper full of notes. I think I forgotten to bring something else too. But I was almost in tears when I found out I forgotten to bring my notes with me. Drama much, but it costed me my exam. I couldn't answer a single question. I wasnt in a suitable state to be doing the exam. But I had no choice, I had to do it there and then. Results? I failed miserably.
I thought I could get away by not taking any math related subject this year. Oh look, it's compulsory. So I took the easiest they could offer. Stats 1020. I think. Lecturer was boring, tutor gave me that text book pep talk. I skipped a few lectures, even. I just disliked anything related to math. And now I have to sit for the paper. All I am hoping for, is a pass.
If I don't pass, I know why.
But the crappy part is that I have to find a way to take this unit again, and pass this, so that I can graduate from Monash with my degree, Ba.S ... Is that how you shorten it? LOL
So, its today, tomorrow and then I can board my flight home to Malaysia. Ten days there, and I am off again. It feels like I am traveling the world somehow.
That dream where you dream that you are late for your examination, and then you woke up LATE.
Dreamt that my aunt was around to send me to the examination venue. But nope. I woke up to find that I am alone in my room in Aussie. I had to get to the place by my own, late or early, that will be my choice. Bleah. That's a sign where you know you have to grow up and take full responsibility of your own judgements and actions. Still 19! I have 8 more months to be a teen before being an adult by default. :O Let me be a kid while I still can!! :D Thank you! :D
On the side note: absolutely in love with snsd's paparazzi. :)
2nd July! Another dream will be fulfilled. 0:)
I have an hour until my stats paper starts. Honestly, I feel traumatized by my previous maths paper (last year). That paper really scarred me bad. :(
Maths is one subject I dread most out all my subjects. Ever since the alphabets came in, additional maths was something I could never do. And hence, the panic. For wanting to do good, but incapable of doing so. :/ I just couldn't grasp the concept. A Chinese Asian who know nuts about maths, is quite an embarrassment.
Anyhow. I remember very well I was worried sick for my math paper last year. Stayed up til late to do some studying. Ended up indulging into a pint of green tea icecream. Which was a very bad idea; it kept up wide awake, wide awake til I had to force myself to sleep at 7am in the morning. Thankfully, the paper wasnt til noon. Which meant, I still have time to have some rest and head over for the exam. I was wrong still. :/ I ended up feeling so much more panic-ier than I should ever. When I was waiting for the doors to open, I knew I forgotten to bring something along with me. Little did I know, it was the most important thing for the examination: the two precede of paper full of notes. I think I forgotten to bring something else too. But I was almost in tears when I found out I forgotten to bring my notes with me. Drama much, but it costed me my exam. I couldn't answer a single question. I wasnt in a suitable state to be doing the exam. But I had no choice, I had to do it there and then. Results? I failed miserably.
I thought I could get away by not taking any math related subject this year. Oh look, it's compulsory. So I took the easiest they could offer. Stats 1020. I think. Lecturer was boring, tutor gave me that text book pep talk. I skipped a few lectures, even. I just disliked anything related to math. And now I have to sit for the paper. All I am hoping for, is a pass.
If I don't pass, I know why.
But the crappy part is that I have to find a way to take this unit again, and pass this, so that I can graduate from Monash with my degree, Ba.S ... Is that how you shorten it? LOL
So, its today, tomorrow and then I can board my flight home to Malaysia. Ten days there, and I am off again. It feels like I am traveling the world somehow.
That dream where you dream that you are late for your examination, and then you woke up LATE.
Dreamt that my aunt was around to send me to the examination venue. But nope. I woke up to find that I am alone in my room in Aussie. I had to get to the place by my own, late or early, that will be my choice. Bleah. That's a sign where you know you have to grow up and take full responsibility of your own judgements and actions. Still 19! I have 8 more months to be a teen before being an adult by default. :O Let me be a kid while I still can!! :D Thank you! :D
On the side note: absolutely in love with snsd's paparazzi. :)
2nd July! Another dream will be fulfilled. 0:)
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Ooh. I burnt my tongue... Again. It gets slightly annoying, really. You are all cold and all you want to do is warm yourself with some good warm food in your belly. It's cold out, but the food is just too cold for your tongue. :/
Either that or I am just getting myself really hungry, just wanting to shove whatever food I have cooked into my mouth. But I kept burning my tongue, still. Mehh.
It is just two more jumps before I can relieve all my studying stress and head home for a relaxing holiday. At least, that is what I am hoping for. Will I get it, or will I not?
Have been yearning for the moment where I can actually get home and to fill my tummy with glorious Malaysian food that I am more used to. Especially my aunt's cooking. Definitely something I have been craving for, for a loooooong time now. Thinking about what to eat, and cooking my meals tends to get a little bit... boring and a handful sometimes. You need a full heart when cooking, otherwise you will be eating CRAP. Eating CRAP on a sucky day will only make your day even more suckier. :/
Ten days, is all I have in Malaysia. After a few adjustments, I have only ten days left. It really doesnt feel like it is enough, considering the list of food I WANT to eat. :/ oh how will I manage this? Hrmmmmmmm
Well, dinner today is CRAP. :/
Either that or I am just getting myself really hungry, just wanting to shove whatever food I have cooked into my mouth. But I kept burning my tongue, still. Mehh.
It is just two more jumps before I can relieve all my studying stress and head home for a relaxing holiday. At least, that is what I am hoping for. Will I get it, or will I not?
Have been yearning for the moment where I can actually get home and to fill my tummy with glorious Malaysian food that I am more used to. Especially my aunt's cooking. Definitely something I have been craving for, for a loooooong time now. Thinking about what to eat, and cooking my meals tends to get a little bit... boring and a handful sometimes. You need a full heart when cooking, otherwise you will be eating CRAP. Eating CRAP on a sucky day will only make your day even more suckier. :/
Ten days, is all I have in Malaysia. After a few adjustments, I have only ten days left. It really doesnt feel like it is enough, considering the list of food I WANT to eat. :/ oh how will I manage this? Hrmmmmmmm
Well, dinner today is CRAP. :/
Thursday, June 14, 2012
"On completion of this unit, students will understand the key steps of the scientific method and how these are applied to real problems that involve data analysis and interpretation, and will gain an appreciation of how statistical data is collected, analysed and stored, and the importance of statistical techniques in the analysis of data. Students will be able to use Excel to present and interpret data graphically, determine confidence intervals, calculate normal probabilities, carry out regression and interpret results, conduct hypothesis testing and interpret results, and to communicate findings through a scientific report. The unit is designed for students without a strong mathematics background."
You really didn't have to read the whole paragraph, my point has been bolded. :)
That, was the description for my statistics unit : SCI1020
The one subject I dreaded most throughout this whole semester. I regretted massively when I had placed this 'workshop' class to 9am on every Tuesdays. That specific class just makes me feel extremely dumb. Dumb to a point where I would rather sit at home and cry myself to sleep. That, was just an exaggeration, but I am going to say this one subject got me really hay-wired.
The lecturer doesn't seem like she knows what exactly she was teaching, my replacement workshop lecturer gave me that 'you are in college and you MUST bring your heavy textbook whenever you have lecture' pep-talk. Despite me feeling extremely dumb in every workshop, I would still bug the crap out of the lecturer. I hate that I feel dumb, but the bugging paid off. At least I learned something out of the extreme buggings. I PAID FOR THIS.
So, apparently this was the easiest math unit around. Of course I was going to take it after that nightmare-ish experience I had with Maths 3CD back in AusMat. It scarred me well. Despite that, I still had not clue what was going on. All statistical words, only confused me even more.
Dear Math,
Has anyone told you that you work so much better when there were only numbers and brackets? Even with all those weird squiggly strokes around (plus, minus, multiply, divide, square root, you name it, SYMBOLS) you were still workable. But why oh why must you have words in you? Why must you make our lives so much more difficult? I have never felt so much dumber since alphabets and words started appearing in you. :(
Fact that I am a Chinese, I am SUPPOSEDLY good at maths. But hey, I just could never ACE math. I could never... Why do you have to make me look so much more dumb than I already am? :(
I do not have an ending to this little ridiculous note to 'Math'.
Let's just hope this is the last time I have to deal with maths. I am hoping it really is the last time I h... oh wait. Chemistry.
I, have nowhere else to run.
But I will pass this stats unit. I WILL!
You really didn't have to read the whole paragraph, my point has been bolded. :)
That, was the description for my statistics unit : SCI1020
The one subject I dreaded most throughout this whole semester. I regretted massively when I had placed this 'workshop' class to 9am on every Tuesdays. That specific class just makes me feel extremely dumb. Dumb to a point where I would rather sit at home and cry myself to sleep. That, was just an exaggeration, but I am going to say this one subject got me really hay-wired.
The lecturer doesn't seem like she knows what exactly she was teaching, my replacement workshop lecturer gave me that 'you are in college and you MUST bring your heavy textbook whenever you have lecture' pep-talk. Despite me feeling extremely dumb in every workshop, I would still bug the crap out of the lecturer. I hate that I feel dumb, but the bugging paid off. At least I learned something out of the extreme buggings. I PAID FOR THIS.
So, apparently this was the easiest math unit around. Of course I was going to take it after that nightmare-ish experience I had with Maths 3CD back in AusMat. It scarred me well. Despite that, I still had not clue what was going on. All statistical words, only confused me even more.
Dear Math,
Has anyone told you that you work so much better when there were only numbers and brackets? Even with all those weird squiggly strokes around (plus, minus, multiply, divide, square root, you name it, SYMBOLS) you were still workable. But why oh why must you have words in you? Why must you make our lives so much more difficult? I have never felt so much dumber since alphabets and words started appearing in you. :(
Fact that I am a Chinese, I am SUPPOSEDLY good at maths. But hey, I just could never ACE math. I could never... Why do you have to make me look so much more dumb than I already am? :(
I do not have an ending to this little ridiculous note to 'Math'.
Let's just hope this is the last time I have to deal with maths. I am hoping it really is the last time I h... oh wait. Chemistry.
I, have nowhere else to run.
But I will pass this stats unit. I WILL!
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Where my fears and hopes come from, are my dreams.
Maybe not too much on the hopes part, but fears are a definite.
Am pretty sure I have posted something about dreams before. Tried searching for it, but I really have no clue where it is now. HAHAHA Oops.
I have a fear of spirits, ghosts and similar things. Even when I am dragged into a haunted house, knowing everything is not real, I would still be scared. Scared to a point where I can't open my eyes, not scream, wanting to curl up at that point and not move a single muscle, sweat cold sweat. I guess what I do not understand about such things, scared me the most. Especially when you listen to stories that would scare the crap out of you : Ghost stories. Really not my kind of thing. I learned as much as it raises my curiosity, I was better of not knowing at all. Otherwise, if I do happen to dream of it, I was pretty much dead.
Dreams are where we are able to let loose of ourselves. At least, that is how I find my inner peace. Things that would never happen, happen. Things that would happen in real life, does not necessarily happen in dreams too. Which makes dreams so much more special to me. I feel like a child when I wake up from a happy dream. Trust me, I have this habit of remembering dreams and wonder what is the hidden message beneath it all. After all, there are sayings that dreams are practically expressions of things you want to happen, but couldn't in real life. Dream is my way of escaping reality.
Which is why I must get my 8 hours of beauty sleep every single night. If that doesn't happen, I would be really grumpy about it. Would definitely complain about it for the rest of the day, UNTIL I do get my beauty sleep.
Recurring dreams are the reasons to why I have fears today.
- Fear of chewing chewing gum
- Fear of witnessing injured animals
- Fear of spirits and ghosts and such
Probably the fear of taking examinations too? But I guess this is a general fear that everyone has. I simply don't see how people can get a comfortable sleep the night before their exams. There is just too much going through my head to worry about:
+ waking up in time for the exam
+ making sure I have everything I need for the examination
+ wondering if I would be hungry during the exams
+ making sure I have a water bottle filled with water in case I get thirsty
+ making sure I have a watch with me so that I can keep track with my time
+ making sure I get my way to the exam venue
+ alot more, really. Don't you people feel the same too? oh god. :/
With that aside, I am going to talk about my dream last night, which is very much related to my fear of ghosts.
Dreams are so weird that anything happens whenever it likes. LMAO. Liking how extremely random it gets sometimes. Doesn't make sense, but it has some story line to it SOMEHOW. Ridiculous!
Somehow in that dream of mine, the current house I am living in, was somehow haunted. The whole dream turned really weird where we have a 'shaman' (that's what google translated BOMOH to) came to each of our rooms to cast some spell or some sort of prayers to eliminate the ghosts or something. I was scared to the ultimate, but at the same time, I was trying to brainwash myself into believing it wasn't real, or at least my room wasn't haunted. But then the 'shaman' ended up coming to my room too, and started going all mumbly with some foreign language.
Then the dream somehow looped into somebody finding out that I have this fear, and was enrolled with this session whereby everybody in the session will experience ghost witnessing for the first time in their lives. Everybody on board were all daring and were fascinated by the fact that they were going to have a shot in seeing them for the first time. I, on the other hand, was pretty much TERRIFIED. I tried convincing myself: if I do see them this time, maybe I won't be afraid anymore? Maybe they are not that bad after all? BUT I COULDN'T OPEN MY EYES EVEN IN MY DREAMS TO LOOK AT THEM.
oh god.
Really. It was terrifying. I had that image in my head the whole time when I was apparently in that session. Images of scary looking monsters and ghosts that would scare the crap out of me. I just couldn't.
The fact that we know NOTHING about the powers of ghost, the fact that they have no definite shape of image, the fact that they are MOSTLY scary looking, it haunts me. I am scaring myself with all those vivid images in my head about how they look.... THEY ALL LOOK SO SCARY!!!! T.T
noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
and hence, I grew a fear of the dark too. That thought of something ultimately scary popping out from NOWHERE, is a much much much higher scale than terrifying to me.
You can ask me to do bungee jumping and all, I would pretty much do it, maybe with a few thoughts and a little shiver, but I would. But... a haunted house? I would CRY on the spot. :/
This fear is something I definitely cannot overcome. I am scarred for life. D:
xxx
On the side note, this is something that I wrote last year on a friend's journal. I like the colours in this scene. :)
You close your eyes, concentrate on your breathing, taking a deep breath in, feeling your lungs expanding, slowly feeling like you are calming down, feeling all those petty problems fading away, your mind is clear, all you see is a pitch black vision; nothing else in sight, you release the air that you breathe in, slowly, releasing the pressure off of your chest, relaxing your body, calming your soul, drifting off to space into the pitch black darkness.
Slowly imagine that you are amongst the clouds. You see the blue sky above you, while you feel the soft, tender, fluffy feeling of the cloud. Floating across the sea of clouds. Weightless, burdenless, carefree. At a distance, you see the sun gleaming, painting the sky with shades of yellow. Watching how the sunbeams highlight the clouds, watching how the lining of the clouds glow amongst its clouded sea of white fluff, peaceful, pleasant.
Little fairies pop out of the clouds from every angle, each representing each colour of the rainbow. They come to greet you, flying around the area, leaving trails of their own rainbow colour as they fly. Watching them enjoying themselves with one another. Coming up to you, once in a while, wondering who or what you are. Nevertheless, not afraid of your presence. They seem to enjoy your presence, fluttering their wings each time they fly, shimmering glitter particles all over the place. They suddenly fly away from you, grouping together, and flies across the sky in unison. What was left, was the sky painted with a rainbow, bright with its colors and glistening with glitter particles on it...
Maybe not too much on the hopes part, but fears are a definite.
Am pretty sure I have posted something about dreams before. Tried searching for it, but I really have no clue where it is now. HAHAHA Oops.
I have a fear of spirits, ghosts and similar things. Even when I am dragged into a haunted house, knowing everything is not real, I would still be scared. Scared to a point where I can't open my eyes, not scream, wanting to curl up at that point and not move a single muscle, sweat cold sweat. I guess what I do not understand about such things, scared me the most. Especially when you listen to stories that would scare the crap out of you : Ghost stories. Really not my kind of thing. I learned as much as it raises my curiosity, I was better of not knowing at all. Otherwise, if I do happen to dream of it, I was pretty much dead.
Dreams are where we are able to let loose of ourselves. At least, that is how I find my inner peace. Things that would never happen, happen. Things that would happen in real life, does not necessarily happen in dreams too. Which makes dreams so much more special to me. I feel like a child when I wake up from a happy dream. Trust me, I have this habit of remembering dreams and wonder what is the hidden message beneath it all. After all, there are sayings that dreams are practically expressions of things you want to happen, but couldn't in real life. Dream is my way of escaping reality.
Which is why I must get my 8 hours of beauty sleep every single night. If that doesn't happen, I would be really grumpy about it. Would definitely complain about it for the rest of the day, UNTIL I do get my beauty sleep.
Recurring dreams are the reasons to why I have fears today.
- Fear of chewing chewing gum
- Fear of witnessing injured animals
- Fear of spirits and ghosts and such
Probably the fear of taking examinations too? But I guess this is a general fear that everyone has. I simply don't see how people can get a comfortable sleep the night before their exams. There is just too much going through my head to worry about:
+ waking up in time for the exam
+ making sure I have everything I need for the examination
+ wondering if I would be hungry during the exams
+ making sure I have a water bottle filled with water in case I get thirsty
+ making sure I have a watch with me so that I can keep track with my time
+ making sure I get my way to the exam venue
+ alot more, really. Don't you people feel the same too? oh god. :/
With that aside, I am going to talk about my dream last night, which is very much related to my fear of ghosts.
Dreams are so weird that anything happens whenever it likes. LMAO. Liking how extremely random it gets sometimes. Doesn't make sense, but it has some story line to it SOMEHOW. Ridiculous!
Somehow in that dream of mine, the current house I am living in, was somehow haunted. The whole dream turned really weird where we have a 'shaman' (that's what google translated BOMOH to) came to each of our rooms to cast some spell or some sort of prayers to eliminate the ghosts or something. I was scared to the ultimate, but at the same time, I was trying to brainwash myself into believing it wasn't real, or at least my room wasn't haunted. But then the 'shaman' ended up coming to my room too, and started going all mumbly with some foreign language.
Then the dream somehow looped into somebody finding out that I have this fear, and was enrolled with this session whereby everybody in the session will experience ghost witnessing for the first time in their lives. Everybody on board were all daring and were fascinated by the fact that they were going to have a shot in seeing them for the first time. I, on the other hand, was pretty much TERRIFIED. I tried convincing myself: if I do see them this time, maybe I won't be afraid anymore? Maybe they are not that bad after all? BUT I COULDN'T OPEN MY EYES EVEN IN MY DREAMS TO LOOK AT THEM.
oh god.
Really. It was terrifying. I had that image in my head the whole time when I was apparently in that session. Images of scary looking monsters and ghosts that would scare the crap out of me. I just couldn't.
The fact that we know NOTHING about the powers of ghost, the fact that they have no definite shape of image, the fact that they are MOSTLY scary looking, it haunts me. I am scaring myself with all those vivid images in my head about how they look.... THEY ALL LOOK SO SCARY!!!! T.T
noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
and hence, I grew a fear of the dark too. That thought of something ultimately scary popping out from NOWHERE, is a much much much higher scale than terrifying to me.
You can ask me to do bungee jumping and all, I would pretty much do it, maybe with a few thoughts and a little shiver, but I would. But... a haunted house? I would CRY on the spot. :/
This fear is something I definitely cannot overcome. I am scarred for life. D:
xxx
On the side note, this is something that I wrote last year on a friend's journal. I like the colours in this scene. :)
You close your eyes, concentrate on your breathing, taking a deep breath in, feeling your lungs expanding, slowly feeling like you are calming down, feeling all those petty problems fading away, your mind is clear, all you see is a pitch black vision; nothing else in sight, you release the air that you breathe in, slowly, releasing the pressure off of your chest, relaxing your body, calming your soul, drifting off to space into the pitch black darkness.
Slowly imagine that you are amongst the clouds. You see the blue sky above you, while you feel the soft, tender, fluffy feeling of the cloud. Floating across the sea of clouds. Weightless, burdenless, carefree. At a distance, you see the sun gleaming, painting the sky with shades of yellow. Watching how the sunbeams highlight the clouds, watching how the lining of the clouds glow amongst its clouded sea of white fluff, peaceful, pleasant.
Little fairies pop out of the clouds from every angle, each representing each colour of the rainbow. They come to greet you, flying around the area, leaving trails of their own rainbow colour as they fly. Watching them enjoying themselves with one another. Coming up to you, once in a while, wondering who or what you are. Nevertheless, not afraid of your presence. They seem to enjoy your presence, fluttering their wings each time they fly, shimmering glitter particles all over the place. They suddenly fly away from you, grouping together, and flies across the sky in unison. What was left, was the sky painted with a rainbow, bright with its colors and glistening with glitter particles on it...
Monday, June 4, 2012
Have been feeling highly emotional these days.
The moment I feel empty on the inside, the impact somehow multiplies.
It really is best if I could avoid feeling down at all times,
but it really is impossible to be upright and chirpy through everything.
It really is.
Today, is just one of those days.
Where I wake up, feeling empty, with no aim, nothing.
Just empty.
The moment one emotional song hits me, it adds up.
Epic facepalm moment.
Biology exam tomorrow, 144 multiple choice questions. I should be able to nail it. After all, I love bio. Just needing to find that strength to just attempt the sample questions at least 3 more times, it would do the trick. But nope. It just wasn't there.
Been feeling rather empty for the past three days now, about there. I couldn't shake it off, somehow. Maybe I just can't wait to go home? Maybe.
Ah well. I still need to buck myself up for the remaining 3 papers after tomorrow's.
Hehe~ weird post, this one.
Good luck with the exams. :)
The moment I feel empty on the inside, the impact somehow multiplies.
It really is best if I could avoid feeling down at all times,
but it really is impossible to be upright and chirpy through everything.
It really is.
Today, is just one of those days.
Where I wake up, feeling empty, with no aim, nothing.
Just empty.
The moment one emotional song hits me, it adds up.
Epic facepalm moment.
Biology exam tomorrow, 144 multiple choice questions. I should be able to nail it. After all, I love bio. Just needing to find that strength to just attempt the sample questions at least 3 more times, it would do the trick. But nope. It just wasn't there.
Been feeling rather empty for the past three days now, about there. I couldn't shake it off, somehow. Maybe I just can't wait to go home? Maybe.
Ah well. I still need to buck myself up for the remaining 3 papers after tomorrow's.
Hehe~ weird post, this one.
Good luck with the exams. :)
Saturday, June 2, 2012
New layout. Not too bad eyh? That rustic sort of feel. I kinda like it. Slightly more deep as compared to the previous super ridiculous cheer-y colors I had previously. Hopefully this layout is not as straining as the previous one? Maybe a little more calming? Owh well. I like it though. Have got this sudden obsession with the colour red quite recently. Not too sure why, but purple will always be my bias! Always. :)
Anyhow, my first paper is only two days away. You can probably tell by the sudden cut down of posts from the previous month. I still have random ideas to talk about, just that whenever I do, I would have that thought whereby I need to study instead. Hence, those thoughts were chucked away, and then my blog turns boring. I find it surprising that I still have views eventhough the posts have reduced significantly. True, it may not be as much, but viewers are still here. Thank you so very much. <3 You're definitely the reason that drives me to continue blogging, really. Thank you! <3
I am currently waiting for my sister to come pick me up. She's shifting into her new home, and I am going to help her with cleaning... I guess? Owh well. It's like the least I could do in return of all those awesome goodness she is to me. :) With her shifting to a further place, I would not be able to meet up with her as much as I used to. It would take me up to two buses if I am not mistaken. Its even further from where she used to live. HAHAHA. I have to be more hardworking with my cooking from now on. Bleahhhhh.
So yesterday, the song 'Angel' was playing in my head, randomly. No clue who it was sung by, but the song was still playing when I woke up this morning. Decided to YouTube search the part of the lyrics and voila! Sarah McLachlan. Beautiful song, really. Then I browsed through the comment area of the video. It was literally flooded with posts of people talking about their deceased loved ones, from dogs, best friends, parents. What a thing to read when I was fresh from a good sleep. Seemingly, this song was played during funerals. 'In the arms of an angel'. I guess I understand now. The moment I played my downloaded version, that rush of emotions was pretty scary.
Is that what you get when you 'truly' understand the meaning of a song? Quite freaky though. :O
Hahahahaha! Yes! I am going home soon! Only 4 exams papers is the barrier against it now! As the passes, the barricades will make way, and I am on my way home before I know it. Hehehe. Oh the joy. :)
One thing for sure is that I have definitely changed alot from when I was surrounded with familiar people and now, with complete strangers. Not too certain how exactly I have changed, but I know I have. Maybe I would scare the crap out of some people, maybe. We shall see, shall we?
Fingers crossed I will do well for all my papers! :D
Winterrrrrr is officially here! Brrrrrrrrrrr~
Anyhow, my first paper is only two days away. You can probably tell by the sudden cut down of posts from the previous month. I still have random ideas to talk about, just that whenever I do, I would have that thought whereby I need to study instead. Hence, those thoughts were chucked away, and then my blog turns boring. I find it surprising that I still have views eventhough the posts have reduced significantly. True, it may not be as much, but viewers are still here. Thank you so very much. <3 You're definitely the reason that drives me to continue blogging, really. Thank you! <3
I am currently waiting for my sister to come pick me up. She's shifting into her new home, and I am going to help her with cleaning... I guess? Owh well. It's like the least I could do in return of all those awesome goodness she is to me. :) With her shifting to a further place, I would not be able to meet up with her as much as I used to. It would take me up to two buses if I am not mistaken. Its even further from where she used to live. HAHAHA. I have to be more hardworking with my cooking from now on. Bleahhhhh.
So yesterday, the song 'Angel' was playing in my head, randomly. No clue who it was sung by, but the song was still playing when I woke up this morning. Decided to YouTube search the part of the lyrics and voila! Sarah McLachlan. Beautiful song, really. Then I browsed through the comment area of the video. It was literally flooded with posts of people talking about their deceased loved ones, from dogs, best friends, parents. What a thing to read when I was fresh from a good sleep. Seemingly, this song was played during funerals. 'In the arms of an angel'. I guess I understand now. The moment I played my downloaded version, that rush of emotions was pretty scary.
Is that what you get when you 'truly' understand the meaning of a song? Quite freaky though. :O
Hahahahaha! Yes! I am going home soon! Only 4 exams papers is the barrier against it now! As the passes, the barricades will make way, and I am on my way home before I know it. Hehehe. Oh the joy. :)
One thing for sure is that I have definitely changed alot from when I was surrounded with familiar people and now, with complete strangers. Not too certain how exactly I have changed, but I know I have. Maybe I would scare the crap out of some people, maybe. We shall see, shall we?
Fingers crossed I will do well for all my papers! :D
Winterrrrrr is officially here! Brrrrrrrrrrr~
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