The moment of realisation when you are too far behind to catch up.

Would you give up or would you push your darndest to get it on par or even better?

That passion for cheer had never once died out. I would just be extremely excited whenever there is a cheer element around. I just couldn't. Each time I try to find a way back into the sport, things never turned out well, and as years passed, it feels as though I could no longer keep up.

Watching REBELS perform was pretty much a dream come true. Ever since I knew about them, I tried following up with whatever they do. Somehow, they were the reason why I felt like I still have the chance to cheer again someday. Adding some of the members on Facebook, just to keep up with their cheer lives, they all inspire me. The jealousy of seeing them all in cheer outfits, pulling out awesome stunts and such. Ahh...

I had the chance to join one of their practice. One can never know how much that one practice meant to me. Nervous as hell, knowing that I knew some of these people just plainly through Facebook, also my nonexistent capability to cheer... It gets a little too overwhelming. But no doubt, it was one of the best experience I ever had. Making me wish I could cheer again as something that is more than a hobby.

Cheerleadering is life.

I am sure many out there could relate to this. I wish I could too.

Wishing.

Maybe I should stop? 6years of trying, but I have yet to get it back into my life. With so much advanceness in cheer today, I don't know how am I capable of catching up. Maybe as a backspotter? Lol. I just gave myself a little hope there. I couldn't do a cartwheel properly, what chances do I get for landing a spot in a proper cheerleading squad, right? :/

Also, this scoliosis is another factor.

Letting go, has never been easy. It never will be, ever.